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Seven Drunken Nights

Seven Drunken Nights published on

As I got home on Monday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a horse outside the door where my horse ought to be
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that horse outside the door where my horse ought to be?

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you cannot see
That’s a lovely sow that me mother sent to me
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But a saddle on a sow sure I never seen before

And as I got home on Tuesday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a coat behind the door where my coat ought to be
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that coat behind the door where my coat ought to be

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you cannot see
That’s a lovely blanket that me mother sent to me
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But buttons on a blanket sure I never seen before

And as I got home on Wednesday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a pipe upon the chair where my pipe ought to be
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that pipe up on the chair where my pipe ought to be

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you cannot see
That’s a lovely tin whistle that me mother sent to me
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But tobacco in a tin whistle sure I never seen before

And as I got home on Thursday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two boots beneath the bed where my boots ought to be
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns them boots beneath the bed where my boots ought to be

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you cannot see
Those are two lovely Geranium pots me mother sent to me
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But laces on Geranium pots I never saw before

And as I got home on Friday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a head upon the bed where my ought to be
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that head upon the bed where my head ought to be

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you can ot see
That’s a lovely baby that me mother sent to me
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But whiskers on a baby sure I never seen before

And as I got home on Saturday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two hands upon her breasts where my hands ought to be
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns the hands upon your breasts where my hands ought to be

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you cannot see
That’s a lovely night gown that me mother sent to me
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But fingers on a night gown sure I never seen before

As I got home on Sunday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a lad sneaking out the back, a quarter after three.
So, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me
Who was that lad sneaking out the back a quarter after three?

Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool,
So drunk you cannot see
That was just the tax man that the Queen she sent to me.
I’ve traveled the world all over, a hundred miles or more
But an Englishman who can last till three I’ve never seen before

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